You Never Let Go by Matt Redman

Early in the morning...

It's early, and I've been up for a while. Never mind that I didn't get much sleep last night, I had to be up.
Breakfast pizza is bubbling away in the oven. When it's ready, I'll package it up in aluminum foil and bring it away to my daughter's Drill Team practice because it is my turn to supply breakfast.

But that's not why I'm writing this. I'm writing to challenge myself. To challenge myself to get out of bed. Early. Because after I'm up, I like it. I like the peace. The solitude for half an hour after Mark has left for work and before Peter & Leah are awake. (Three mornings a week, Hannah is already up & out the door by now.) I have time to have a cup of coffee. And think. And pray. And be grateful.

So even though it is very hard for me to get out of bed early (I typically press my "snooze" button numerous times...), I am going to try.

Because it is good for my soul.

Parenting

It's too late now, but I've decided I don't want to be a parent anymore. It's too hard.
I wonder if God had those feelings. (Okay, I know he didn't, but...) After the rejection, and the mouthiness, and the disrespect, and the disobedience, and the hate directed at him, why didn't he just give up?
Because there are days I want to just give up.
But I can't. Even though there are days I would very much like to.

Being a sheep

So whenever I head south on highway 75 to points like Le Mars or Sioux City or beyond, I go past this farm.
A sheep farm to be exact.
And every time I drive past the place I'm reminded of one time when I saw something funny there.
It was a sheep.
Walking around.
With a bucket on its head.
Like nothing.
Was.
Wrong.
I remember thinking, you stupid sheep, have someone take that bucket off your head and you'll feel so much better. You'll SEE so much better. You'll be able to eat, too.
...
...
...
And then I remembered. Jesus is the Good Shepherd.
For me.
Because I am a sheep.
And more often than not, I walk around with a figurative bucket on my head.
Like
nothing
is
wrong.
And I wonder how often Jesus shakes His head at me and thinks, "Silly sheep, let me get that off for you. You'll feel so much better. You'll SEE so much better. And you'll be able to eat."

It's been a long time since I first saw that sheep wandering around its pen with a bucket on its head like that. But the sight of that farm yard--whether there are sheep in it or not--reminds me to keep my head out of the bucket, or when I do get it in one, to let Jesus remove it so I can live.

I can

I started with about 10 pails full, this is how far I got with scalding them before I started taking pictures.

Here's the rest. All loose & ready to be peeled.

Once they're naked, I throw 'em in the food processor.

Add a few herbs & spices...

Boil away!

Here are the jars ready to come out of their spa bath...

Mmmmm...summer's goodness, ready to be eaten another day!

Praying for Parmelee

I've mentioned a lot on here about Hannah and Mexico, but there was another member of our family who took a mission trip, one much closer to home, and in a lot of ways much more dangerous than going to Mexico.
Peter went to Parmelee. In South Dakota. On the Rosebud Indian Reservation. Really close to home. The cost was very minimal--$50--but the life impact is priceless. Parmelee is a dark place. Heavy. Palpable. Here and there a light shines, bringing hope, but for the most part the hope is rejected. For drinking. For drugs. For sleep.
I'm so torn about his trip. It was an excellent experience for him. It was humbling for me. It is "our" fault that there is so little hope on the reservation. Europeans came here and conquered. Conquered the land and the people who knew it best. Who knew the balance. Now that conquering is catching up to us.
The sins of the fathers will be visited on the children, to the 3rd and 4th generation...

School's just around the corner?

I know I wrote earlier in June about summer being over already, but that doesn't stop the fact that it has been an amazing summer and I don't really want it to end. Overall, there's been little conflict between the kids (hooray!) and even though it has been MUCH wetter than normal, resulting in an indoor pool in the basement (boo) I've enjoyed the more laid back relaxed feel to the days and I'm not ready to give them up yet.

Hannah's trip to Mexico was amazing. She would love to go back. Time will tell. She's ready to embark on the final chapter of her high school career, her Senior year. It will likely prove to be a year of a lot of ups and downs and rough decisions (college suggestions, anyone?)